Tales of a Barista

Tales of a Barista:
As a Starbucks employee...damn I hate saying that out loud... anyways, as a member of the green apron clan, we are marked as people of the community. People come into the store and know us by name. Literally, a third of the customers or more know our names (and we don't wear name tags). And we know what drinks they are going to order every single day. They know what's going on in our lives at a superficial level and vice versa. I still don't think me being a staple of the local community should have brought this upon me.

Me: Hi, what would you like today?
Girl: A piece of cinnamon swirl coffee cake.
Me: Anything else I can do for you?
Girl: Make my aunt be alive again.

What...what the ****?!?

Me: Uhhh.... (looooooonng awkward pause) I can't do that, but here's your cinnamon cake.
Girl: Her wake is tomorrow. They don't know if she died the day before or the day of Christmas. No one had heard from her in a couple week. Isn't that sad that she may have died before her last Christmas?

Now I know she is dead serious (pun intended). On top of that, I don't have the heart to tell her that her late aunt's last Christmas was over a year ago if that's the case.

Me: Uhhh...(awkward fake smile)
Girl: Now you're going to make me cry...

Mind you, I have not said one thing on the subject of her dead aunt, in fact, I'm trying everything I can to hustle this poor girl away from my register.

Me: So it'll be $1.95 for the cake.


Tips. Tips are nice, but honestly, I don't think barista's necessarily deserve big tips (i.e. 10%). If you have a complicated drink or a large order, then sure, tips are nice. It's not like we are delivering food or catering to your refill needs every second. We essentially have the same job as a Dairy Queen employee (if you don't know, no, they don't get tips), but like I said, tips are nice. So here is a breakdown of people who are good and bad tippers generally:

Don't count on it:
Families that come in after 1pm
Black people
"Far East" Asians
kids

Spare change only:
Old women
Italians
young women

Either really big or really little, but at least they usually tip:
Middle Eastern
Other Asians (Indian, Pakistani)
White people
other Starbucks employees (actually, place them under good tips or none at all and they usually order 7 complicated drinks)
Hispanics (I'm surprised too, but overall I'd say they tip better than white people ONLY if they aren't ordering regular coffee.)

Constantly Good Tippers:
People early in the morning
Old men if an attractive female barista is working
the one lady I think is Russian

Yes, there are exceptions to the rules. A nice "Far East" Asian girl gave me a $10 tip today because I didn't charge her the day before when she forgot her wallet. An old white guy didn't tip me a red cent even though I did the same thing for him the day before as well. But for the most part, stereotypes do have some foundation to them.